At my weekly OB appointment today I was told that the babies were about 4lbs each....and were growing at a rate of 1/2 lb per week. Given this, they will be 7lbs EACH by July 12th. How exactly does one carry 14lbs of baby PLUS placenta and water weight? I am a little frightened of the next 40 days and of what they will bring. I definitely want the babies to be 7lb each - don't get me wrong. I'd rather suffer than have them in the NICU for one day. However, I'm terrified of how I will manage the simplest of things (going to the bathroom, showering, getting in and out of bed) with that much baby weight in my belly! And folks - I'm not 25 anymore. I'll be 42 on July 2nd- I am old! It's difficult to get in and out of bed now - and I have almost 6 weeks to go. Scary.
I'm also scared of the c-section. I'm not so worried about the recovery - I've been through it once before. But with Kara, they put me under General Anesthesia because I was a total mess. I could not comprehend the moment they pulled her from me and there were no cries. I knew I wouldn't be able to handle it, so I requested the general. This time, I'll have to be awake and lucid, and I'm terrified of being cut open while awake. But I know it will be worth it to hear my babies' cries when they're born. I'm really looking forward to that, because for me, it doesn't seem possible. All I know of pregnancy and birth is the 9-1/2 months of pregnancy, the moment I found out my baby died inside of me, and the moment I woke up from the c-section and looking at my precious daughter, dead in my arms. I cannot fathom hearing their screams when they're born - so I am looking forward to that. But damn, I'm scared of being awake!
Today is my first day of maternity leave and I must say, I will enjoy my time off this summer. I already fee free from the every day pressure of having to put work first, when in my head, the health of my babies is absolutely first. Now I can focus on them while taking it easy on myself, physically and mentally. I may be bored, but I know I'm doing the right thing.
4 comments:
The c-section experience for me was strange (I had a natural delivery with Hope) but obviously so very worth it in the end. I only had the c-section booked the day befor he was born, as we were hoping to induce but I couldn't hold on a day longer (I was 38 weeks) and he was big and too high - so they wouldn't induce. It was a real out of body experience. I woke up, got showered, went to hospital and about three hours later, he was born. All so surreal and so very different from the last time. This will be so different for you, too. Whatever emotions you are feeling in the lead up will all melt away once you hear those cries. Those TWO beautiful cries.
I'm so excited for you. Nervous and anxious also, but mostly excited.
Hold on, Mama.
xo
Hey there. I hear ya about the C-section but the comments on my post last night really helped (including yours!!).
My friend just had two 7lb babies and yes, she was very happy to get to the end of the road but she just took it super easy. DH ran around for her, prepared a tray of food and drinks in the am so if she didn't want to move she didn't have to.
I also know another 7lb twin mom and she gave birth vaginally! No kidding she was up and about 12 hours later!
Thinking of you and sending you calming thoughts!!
We are in the home stretch now!!!!
The C-section procedure itself was a bit strange for me too. Mostly because the doctors and nurses have a job to do, so they are not pampering you the whole time - they're focused on getting the babies out. Once the spinal anesthesia was given (and it really wasn't too bad), your legs go numb, then your belly. It happens very fast. They will test you to be sure you can't feel anything. They had begun opening me up and I didn't even realize it! (I wish they had said, "We're starting now" but they didn't). Then it's this weird pulling and pushing. Not painful like a needle, but uncomfortable like getting shoved around. The anesthesiologist will be right there to give you sedation or pain meds if you seem to need it. The next thing you know, everyone is saying things like, "Oh, look at him!" and then you hear the cry! It was the most incredible sound! I started sobbing with joy as soon as I heard it. I don't even remember them putting me back together because you don't feel that at all. If you have any other specific questions about the C-section, just email me.
Have no time to post a real comment but want you to know that you can do anything.
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